1 00:01:42,811 --> 00:01:43,895 I love my new job. 2 00:01:44,062 --> 00:01:46,982 I just wish the station would give me better assignments. 3 00:01:47,149 --> 00:01:50,277 All I've been covering lately are grocery store openings and flower exhibits 4 00:01:50,444 --> 00:01:52,070 and that dumb dog show this afternoon. 5 00:01:52,237 --> 00:01:55,031 Come on, are you kidding? Those dogs are great little performers. 6 00:01:55,198 --> 00:01:58,034 I wonder why that guy got mad when I tried to wind up his toy poodle. 7 00:01:58,201 --> 00:01:59,870 Oh, yeah. 8 00:02:00,871 --> 00:02:02,706 - Hi, it's me. - Oh, hi. 9 00:02:02,873 --> 00:02:05,167 I saw you come in. 10 00:02:07,252 --> 00:02:09,796 You know how I hate to bother you two, 11 00:02:09,963 --> 00:02:13,341 but I'm having a very special lady over tomorrow night, 12 00:02:13,508 --> 00:02:15,135 Lorraine Sue Ruttenberg, 13 00:02:15,302 --> 00:02:17,471 and I'd like to borrow a few record albums. 14 00:02:17,637 --> 00:02:20,056 - Oh, is this someone important? - Hopefully. 15 00:02:20,223 --> 00:02:23,727 I'm bringing her all the way from Phoenix at enormous expense. 16 00:02:23,894 --> 00:02:27,063 Do you realize how much bus fare is these days? 17 00:02:27,898 --> 00:02:29,524 Well, I'll get you the record albums. 18 00:02:29,691 --> 00:02:32,777 You're probably looking to set the proper mood, eh? 19 00:02:32,944 --> 00:02:35,906 No, I'm looking for cheap thrills. 20 00:02:36,740 --> 00:02:38,116 Oh, here's one of my favorites: 21 00:02:41,536 --> 00:02:42,704 Or a bat can go: 22 00:02:45,624 --> 00:02:49,377 I was thinking more along the lines of Perry Como. 23 00:02:49,544 --> 00:02:51,213 All I have is his Christmas album. 24 00:02:51,379 --> 00:02:55,425 Perfect. "Little Drummer Boy" works quicker than liquor. 25 00:02:55,967 --> 00:02:57,969 Well, good luck, Bick, and thanks for coming by. 26 00:02:58,136 --> 00:02:59,679 You know, it's really... 27 00:03:01,139 --> 00:03:02,224 Mork, if you don't mind, 28 00:03:02,390 --> 00:03:05,936 I'd like to take my hand back home with me. 29 00:03:06,102 --> 00:03:09,105 Mork. Come on, Mork. 30 00:03:10,357 --> 00:03:13,235 Gee, Mr. Bickley, it's too bad you have to run. 31 00:03:13,401 --> 00:03:15,654 I don't think so. 32 00:03:16,696 --> 00:03:19,032 That boy's a little thin from the neck up. 33 00:03:20,075 --> 00:03:22,827 No. Bye. 34 00:03:23,954 --> 00:03:26,665 Mork? Mork? 35 00:03:26,831 --> 00:03:29,292 Oh, no, now, what am I gonna do? 36 00:03:29,459 --> 00:03:30,835 Mork? 37 00:03:31,002 --> 00:03:33,463 Bye, Mr. Bickley. 38 00:03:34,381 --> 00:03:36,424 Mork, what happened to you? You just spaced out. 39 00:03:36,591 --> 00:03:38,260 I'm sorry, Mind, I got a call from Orson. 40 00:03:38,426 --> 00:03:40,136 I had to put my body on hold. 41 00:03:40,303 --> 00:03:43,306 - Oh, Mind, you'll never guess what. - I never have yet. 42 00:03:43,473 --> 00:03:46,309 You'll never guess who's gonna grace us with his magnificent presence. 43 00:03:46,476 --> 00:03:48,478 - Who? - Xerko. 44 00:03:48,645 --> 00:03:50,272 Xerko. 45 00:03:50,438 --> 00:03:52,440 One of the Marx brothers? 46 00:03:52,607 --> 00:03:53,900 No, no, Mind. No. 47 00:03:56,903 --> 00:03:59,030 Oh, he's my hero, my idol. 48 00:03:59,197 --> 00:04:02,242 He's the greatest Orkan that's ever lived. 49 00:04:02,409 --> 00:04:04,160 He's coming here, Mind, he's coming here. 50 00:04:04,327 --> 00:04:06,454 Why would this Xerox wanna come here? 51 00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:09,332 No, no, his name is Xerko, Mind, 52 00:04:09,499 --> 00:04:12,002 and there's no duplicating him. 53 00:04:12,210 --> 00:04:13,795 I don't know why he wants to come here. 54 00:04:13,962 --> 00:04:16,464 Orson didn't tell me, I guess he wanted to make it a surprise. 55 00:04:16,631 --> 00:04:19,467 Isn't it wonderful, though? Oh, boy, he's gonna love our little nest. 56 00:04:19,634 --> 00:04:22,053 It's so warm and wonderful. 57 00:04:22,220 --> 00:04:24,931 Oh, I've gotta clean up this pigsty. 58 00:04:25,473 --> 00:04:27,183 It's filthy. 59 00:04:37,235 --> 00:04:39,029 Xerko? 60 00:04:43,658 --> 00:04:46,745 Oh, Mork, nice to see you again. It's been bleams, na-no. 61 00:04:46,911 --> 00:04:51,124 Oh, sir, you remembered my insignificant, dirt ball name. 62 00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:53,209 Why of course, Mork. My memory is impeccable. 63 00:04:53,376 --> 00:04:56,421 Oh, and the rest of us are merely peccable, sir. 64 00:04:56,588 --> 00:04:58,548 Oh, sir, na-no. 65 00:04:59,174 --> 00:05:00,717 Oh, it's been so long, sir. 66 00:05:00,884 --> 00:05:03,303 I'm gonna have to have this hand bronzed. 67 00:05:04,637 --> 00:05:07,015 Sir, sir, how was your journey? 68 00:05:07,182 --> 00:05:08,349 It was delightful, thank you. 69 00:05:08,516 --> 00:05:11,770 Yes, I came via Air Ork's H-28 prototype beam. 70 00:05:11,936 --> 00:05:14,606 Oh, traveling by beam. I mean, who thought of that? 71 00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:17,692 Well, actually, Mork, I did. 72 00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:20,445 What will I think of next? 73 00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:23,364 Oh, what a guy. I mean... 74 00:05:23,531 --> 00:05:25,200 Why are you here? Orson didn't tell me. 75 00:05:25,366 --> 00:05:28,077 Wait a minute, did I win spend-a-day-with-a-hero contest? 76 00:05:28,244 --> 00:05:31,581 No, no, but we'll have plenty of time to talk about my mission later. 77 00:05:32,499 --> 00:05:35,251 Mork, I admire very much, 78 00:05:35,418 --> 00:05:38,087 admire very much what you've done with this environment. 79 00:05:38,254 --> 00:05:40,006 Oh, you admire something of mine, sir? 80 00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:42,634 You'll find that I admire many things of yours. 81 00:05:42,801 --> 00:05:46,471 Oh, I see you have an Orkan landscape. 82 00:05:46,638 --> 00:05:49,724 Oh, yes, it's a Van Yuch. I have a good ear for paintings. 83 00:05:49,891 --> 00:05:51,976 How nice. I have the original, you know. 84 00:05:52,143 --> 00:05:54,771 Van Yuch himself is hanging in my house. 85 00:05:54,938 --> 00:05:57,941 I hope somebody remembers to feed him while I'm gone. 86 00:06:05,156 --> 00:06:07,867 Mork, I wanna talk about your Earth reports. 87 00:06:08,034 --> 00:06:09,369 Now, they've become so colorful 88 00:06:09,536 --> 00:06:12,497 that Earth is being considered an up-and-coming planet on the move. 89 00:06:12,664 --> 00:06:13,998 We broke the top 40? 90 00:06:14,165 --> 00:06:16,209 - I mean, we're 16 with a bullet? - That's right. 91 00:06:16,709 --> 00:06:19,337 But it seems that the Earth people are so hungry for leadership. 92 00:06:19,504 --> 00:06:22,131 They need someone to guide them into the next century. 93 00:06:22,298 --> 00:06:24,175 And I know just the Orkan who can do it. 94 00:06:24,342 --> 00:06:26,427 Thank you, sir, I'd better go hop in the shower. 95 00:06:26,594 --> 00:06:30,223 Mork. Mork, silly misguided Mork. 96 00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:33,226 I was referring, of course, to myself. 97 00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:35,770 Twinkle of eye, sparkle of teeth. 98 00:06:35,937 --> 00:06:38,982 Oh, me, vacuous of head. I should have known better. 99 00:06:39,148 --> 00:06:41,401 I mean, you're the best there is in the whole universe. 100 00:06:41,568 --> 00:06:43,695 I ought to know, I'm a Xerko groupie. See? 101 00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:48,116 Well, remind me to send you a Xerko lunchbox. 102 00:06:48,283 --> 00:06:51,160 Sir, I mean, I can't believe this. Why am I so lucky? 103 00:06:51,327 --> 00:06:54,789 Because, Mork, you are a key person in my plan for success. 104 00:06:54,956 --> 00:06:57,458 Plan? What's your plan, sir, please? What's the plan...? 105 00:06:57,625 --> 00:06:59,711 Mork, you are so inquisitive. 106 00:06:59,877 --> 00:07:01,212 Now, that's what sets us apart. 107 00:07:01,379 --> 00:07:04,382 You ask and I know. 108 00:07:05,174 --> 00:07:06,634 But you must be patient, my friend. 109 00:07:06,801 --> 00:07:08,803 This also involves your Earthling, Mindy, as well. 110 00:07:08,970 --> 00:07:11,514 I'd like to explain it to the two of you when you're together. 111 00:07:11,681 --> 00:07:12,807 Oh, yes, sir. Yes, sir. 112 00:07:12,974 --> 00:07:15,601 I mean, once again, you're right, Your Everything. 113 00:07:16,686 --> 00:07:19,022 I mean, I can wait just till morning, you know, that's: 114 00:07:20,023 --> 00:07:21,899 Morning already? 115 00:07:22,567 --> 00:07:25,320 Come, sir, let's go, come here. Oh, wait. 116 00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:28,448 Not necessary. 117 00:07:34,203 --> 00:07:37,665 Oh, sir, even though Mindy's asleep, she's gonna be thrilled to meet you. 118 00:07:37,832 --> 00:07:39,709 Well, who can blame her? 119 00:07:48,426 --> 00:07:51,512 Mind, wake up and come out and be filled with awe. 120 00:07:51,679 --> 00:07:54,766 I hope she's wearing her bunny slippers, they're so cute. 121 00:07:56,267 --> 00:07:58,102 - Hi. - I thought you were asleep. 122 00:07:58,269 --> 00:08:00,938 Are you kidding? How could I sleep knowing I'm gonna have a guest 123 00:08:01,105 --> 00:08:02,732 from another galaxy? Is he here yet? 124 00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:05,443 Oh, I don't know, really, Mind, I really don't. 125 00:08:05,610 --> 00:08:08,571 Mind, meet Xerko. 126 00:08:08,738 --> 00:08:12,241 See him, feel him, touch him. 127 00:08:12,700 --> 00:08:14,243 Well, hello. 128 00:08:14,410 --> 00:08:16,037 Hello, Mindy. This is indeed a pleasure. 129 00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:19,749 I've heard so much about you through Mork's reports to Orson. 130 00:08:19,916 --> 00:08:22,251 I must say you're even more lovely. 131 00:08:22,418 --> 00:08:24,337 Oh, well, thank you. 132 00:08:24,921 --> 00:08:26,130 Isn't he wonderful, Mind? 133 00:08:26,297 --> 00:08:27,924 Isn't he everything you ever dreamed of, 134 00:08:28,090 --> 00:08:30,510 especially compared to worm sweat like me? 135 00:08:30,676 --> 00:08:35,431 Welcome to Earth, or na-no, na-no, or whatever I'm supposed to say. 136 00:08:35,598 --> 00:08:37,600 Say what you feel. 137 00:08:45,024 --> 00:08:47,485 Are you sure you're an Orkan? 138 00:08:48,444 --> 00:08:50,196 Of course I am, but I've studied your ways 139 00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:53,449 and I find Earth a fascinating planet. Very fascinating. 140 00:08:53,616 --> 00:08:54,867 And you help make it that way. 141 00:08:55,034 --> 00:08:58,955 Oh, well, shucks and wazoo. 142 00:08:59,121 --> 00:09:01,123 Where have I heard that before? 143 00:09:01,290 --> 00:09:03,209 Mind, he's got a wonderful surprise to tell us. 144 00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:04,961 He had to tell us when we're together. 145 00:09:05,127 --> 00:09:07,797 - What's that surprise, Xerko? - I want your job. 146 00:09:07,964 --> 00:09:09,340 Oh, shucks. 147 00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:12,635 Mindy, what...? 148 00:09:14,262 --> 00:09:15,513 He wants my job. 149 00:09:15,680 --> 00:09:17,557 What do you mean, you want his job? 150 00:09:17,723 --> 00:09:21,811 Well, after a mere formality, the ancient duel of the Hollitacker, 151 00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:24,564 I will become Ork's new observer here on Earth. 152 00:09:25,106 --> 00:09:28,109 Wait a minute, you have everything. Why do you want what I have? 153 00:09:28,276 --> 00:09:30,861 Your reports are becoming too popular and I can't have that. 154 00:09:31,028 --> 00:09:32,780 Unless, of course, I'm giving them. 155 00:09:32,947 --> 00:09:35,908 It would be a giant step in my illustrious career. 156 00:09:36,075 --> 00:09:38,411 And I'm what he wants to step in. 157 00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:43,040 Oh, Mind, I don't have any chance against Xerko the Godlike. 158 00:09:43,207 --> 00:09:45,376 You two will be very happy together. 159 00:09:45,543 --> 00:09:47,253 Really, you really will. 160 00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:50,214 Mork, you can't just give up. 161 00:09:50,381 --> 00:09:53,009 Yup, sure can. Oh, yeah. 162 00:09:54,218 --> 00:09:55,845 Well, if you'll excuse me, 163 00:09:56,012 --> 00:09:59,849 I'm going outside to re-carve that heart that's out on the tree outside to say: 164 00:10:00,016 --> 00:10:02,143 "Xerko and Mindy." 165 00:10:02,518 --> 00:10:03,603 Goodbye. 166 00:10:05,187 --> 00:10:10,359 Oh, by the way, she likes her bologna sundaes without bologna. 167 00:10:19,869 --> 00:10:22,163 Dad, I thought I could handle this myself, but... 168 00:10:22,330 --> 00:10:23,706 You better sit down. 169 00:10:24,206 --> 00:10:26,959 Another Orkan has come to replace Mork and live with me. 170 00:10:27,126 --> 00:10:28,961 I better sit down. 171 00:10:29,128 --> 00:10:32,214 Are you saying there's another Orkan in this house right now? 172 00:10:32,381 --> 00:10:34,508 Yeah, his name is Xerko. 173 00:10:34,675 --> 00:10:36,635 And he and Mork are gonna have some kind of game 174 00:10:36,802 --> 00:10:39,930 called a Holliquacker or Tacker. I don't know what it is. 175 00:10:40,097 --> 00:10:41,223 What's that? 176 00:10:41,390 --> 00:10:44,977 Well, it's when one Orkan challenges another for his job. 177 00:10:45,144 --> 00:10:48,064 He's really trying to take over and I don't know what to do about it. 178 00:10:48,230 --> 00:10:50,983 Honey, don't worry. I'll have a talk with this Xerko. 179 00:10:51,150 --> 00:10:52,777 It isn't that easy. 180 00:10:52,943 --> 00:10:54,779 He's been here less than a day 181 00:10:54,945 --> 00:10:58,240 and he's already tuned up my Jeep, made all his own Earth clothes 182 00:10:58,407 --> 00:11:01,535 and scraped the bugs out of my ceiling lights. 183 00:11:01,702 --> 00:11:03,120 Well, I don't care what he's done. 184 00:11:03,287 --> 00:11:08,209 He just can't come barging into other people's planets and take over. 185 00:11:09,710 --> 00:11:14,006 Okay, little Bebo, we'll have tickle time again tomorrow. 186 00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:15,966 Come on, little fellow. 187 00:11:18,260 --> 00:11:20,096 Now, listen, Mr. Zero. 188 00:11:20,262 --> 00:11:21,722 Oh, you mean Xerko. 189 00:11:21,889 --> 00:11:23,557 You must be Mindy's biological father. 190 00:11:23,724 --> 00:11:26,644 How do you do, Mr. McConnell? It's a pleasure to meet you. 191 00:11:26,811 --> 00:11:29,355 Oh, well, thank you. 192 00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:31,190 But I really think we should have a talk. 193 00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:33,359 Oh, wonderful, wonderful. Shall we all sit down? 194 00:11:33,526 --> 00:11:34,735 Please. 195 00:11:34,902 --> 00:11:39,198 Oh, may I say how nice it is to see people dressing for dinner again. 196 00:11:40,658 --> 00:11:42,785 He's dressed that way because he's the conductor 197 00:11:42,952 --> 00:11:45,079 for the Boulder Symphony Orchestra. 198 00:11:45,246 --> 00:11:47,081 Well, what an honor. 199 00:11:47,248 --> 00:11:50,876 May I ask you, Mr. McConnell, do you enjoy Stravinsky? 200 00:11:51,043 --> 00:11:53,587 Stravinsky? How do you know about Stravinsky? 201 00:11:53,754 --> 00:11:56,257 Oh, we monitor all Earth broadcasts. 202 00:11:56,423 --> 00:12:00,386 Now, I thought that Stravinsky reached his zenith during "Rites of Spring", 203 00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:02,471 until, of course, I heard his "Firebird Suite". 204 00:12:02,638 --> 00:12:04,306 Do you agree? 205 00:12:08,227 --> 00:12:09,645 You know... You know, you're right. 206 00:12:09,812 --> 00:12:11,814 You must have quite a musical background. 207 00:12:11,981 --> 00:12:15,860 Well, actually, I composed the Ork national anthem. 208 00:12:16,026 --> 00:12:19,905 I wrote the song that made my whole world sing. 209 00:12:25,286 --> 00:12:27,079 Really? That's quite impressive. 210 00:12:27,246 --> 00:12:28,455 Thank you, Mr. McConnell. 211 00:12:28,622 --> 00:12:31,125 - Call me Fred. - Why, I'd like that. 212 00:12:31,292 --> 00:12:33,377 I'd also like to see you conduct sometime. 213 00:12:33,544 --> 00:12:35,004 Well, as a matter of fact, 214 00:12:35,170 --> 00:12:37,798 I have a performance in less than an hour and I'm late. 215 00:12:37,965 --> 00:12:40,384 - Oh, can I come along with you, Fred? - Of course. 216 00:12:40,551 --> 00:12:43,804 You'd enjoy it. Tonight we're doing Schubert's "Unfinished Symphony". 217 00:12:43,971 --> 00:12:47,016 Marvelous. Maybe I can finished it for him. 218 00:12:48,100 --> 00:12:51,437 Dad, remember Mork? Mork. 219 00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:54,523 - Oh, yes. Oh, now... Now, Xerko... - Here's your coat, Fred. 220 00:12:54,690 --> 00:12:57,776 Oh, thank you. Thank you. 221 00:12:57,943 --> 00:12:59,028 Nice coat. 222 00:12:59,194 --> 00:13:01,572 You don't happen to have the pattern, do you? 223 00:13:04,742 --> 00:13:06,118 And now, really, now listen, 224 00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:09,330 you just can't come down to Earth and move in like this. 225 00:13:09,496 --> 00:13:11,248 Now, please, I understand your concern, 226 00:13:11,415 --> 00:13:13,083 but Mork's been here for a couple of years 227 00:13:13,250 --> 00:13:15,210 and you've had a chance to grow attached to him. 228 00:13:15,377 --> 00:13:17,963 I'm sure, if given time, you'll grow attached to me too. 229 00:13:18,130 --> 00:13:22,426 - Well, you like Stravinsky. - Dad. 230 00:13:22,593 --> 00:13:25,638 Oh, honey, Xerko seems like a civilized being. 231 00:13:25,804 --> 00:13:27,890 I'm sure that I can reason with him. 232 00:13:28,057 --> 00:13:30,559 Don't worry, honey. Goodbye. 233 00:13:31,226 --> 00:13:34,063 Remember, the Hollitacker's at midnight. 234 00:13:34,229 --> 00:13:38,108 I want you there when Mork concedes, and wear something tight. 235 00:13:40,819 --> 00:13:43,447 Well, Mork isn't gonna concede if I have anything to do with it. 236 00:13:43,614 --> 00:13:45,866 He might not believe in himself, but I believe in Mork. 237 00:13:46,033 --> 00:13:47,284 I love it when you're angry. 238 00:13:53,374 --> 00:13:56,543 Who said you had to go to Disneyland to have fun on Earth? 239 00:13:56,960 --> 00:13:59,338 You're an E-ticket. 240 00:14:05,511 --> 00:14:08,055 Mork, stop that packing. 241 00:14:08,222 --> 00:14:09,932 You're not a quitter. 242 00:14:10,099 --> 00:14:12,267 Look, I understand how you feel. 243 00:14:12,434 --> 00:14:14,603 When I was a little girl, there was this kid in school 244 00:14:14,770 --> 00:14:16,313 who was always the best at everything. 245 00:14:16,480 --> 00:14:17,940 She was class president 246 00:14:18,107 --> 00:14:20,567 and cafeteria monitor and teacher's pet. 247 00:14:20,734 --> 00:14:23,320 The one thing I was really good at in school was spelling. 248 00:14:23,487 --> 00:14:24,655 But she was better. 249 00:14:24,822 --> 00:14:27,616 Maybe we should get her to fight the Hollitacker, Mind. 250 00:14:27,783 --> 00:14:29,952 Every year at the school spelling bee, 251 00:14:30,119 --> 00:14:32,746 there were only just two of us left on the stage, her and me. 252 00:14:32,913 --> 00:14:36,208 And every year, she was always the last one standing on that stage. 253 00:14:36,375 --> 00:14:40,129 But I kept trying, until one time it was just down between the two of us, 254 00:14:40,295 --> 00:14:42,131 and the word was hors d'oeuvres. 255 00:14:42,297 --> 00:14:44,550 And she blew it. 256 00:14:44,758 --> 00:14:47,386 Oh, it was wonderful. 257 00:14:47,928 --> 00:14:49,972 You mean, you beat her? You won? 258 00:14:50,139 --> 00:14:52,599 Yeah. And I still have the ribbon to prove it. 259 00:14:52,766 --> 00:14:54,393 See, you can do it if you try. 260 00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:56,103 How are you gonna know otherwise? 261 00:14:56,270 --> 00:14:58,480 Yeah. Yeah, you're right, Mind. 262 00:14:58,647 --> 00:15:01,233 - You really think I have a chance? - Sure, Mork. 263 00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:03,485 If you want something, you'll find a way to get it. 264 00:15:03,652 --> 00:15:04,987 - Yeah. - I know you can do it. 265 00:15:05,154 --> 00:15:07,531 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I can do it. Yeah. 266 00:15:07,698 --> 00:15:09,575 Whatever happened to that girl, Mind? 267 00:15:09,741 --> 00:15:10,826 I don't know. 268 00:15:10,993 --> 00:15:14,037 I kind of lost track of her after she won the Nobel Prize. 269 00:15:16,206 --> 00:15:18,250 Let the Hollitacker begin. 270 00:15:18,417 --> 00:15:21,128 Mork, come down and be defeated. 271 00:15:22,588 --> 00:15:25,883 Oh, Mindy, you look absolutely beautiful. 272 00:15:26,049 --> 00:15:28,635 After I win, I will present you with the fruits of my victory, 273 00:15:28,802 --> 00:15:30,137 Mork's ears. 274 00:15:30,304 --> 00:15:31,763 Ears? 275 00:15:31,930 --> 00:15:33,932 Well, Mork told me this was a non-violent contest. 276 00:15:34,099 --> 00:15:37,644 Oh, it is. Orkan ears screw off. 277 00:15:38,645 --> 00:15:42,357 Mork, do I take your continued absence to mean a forfeit? 278 00:15:42,524 --> 00:15:46,153 Never. I'm just waiting till my knees to stop knocking. 279 00:15:57,331 --> 00:15:59,124 Mork runs from no man. 280 00:15:59,291 --> 00:16:03,587 And tonight, I'm gonna try... Try to do my best. 281 00:16:04,838 --> 00:16:07,007 Well, maybe it's a good night to do my laundry, Mind. 282 00:16:07,174 --> 00:16:08,342 Oh, Mork. 283 00:16:08,508 --> 00:16:12,012 Remember, no matter what happens, you're a winner to me. 284 00:16:12,179 --> 00:16:13,805 Oh, thank you, Mind. 285 00:16:13,972 --> 00:16:16,183 I brought the ribbon that I won at the spelling bee. 286 00:16:16,350 --> 00:16:19,770 I want you to wear it to remind you of a little girl who wouldn't give up. 287 00:16:19,936 --> 00:16:21,813 - Oh, thank you, Mind. - Okay? 288 00:16:25,275 --> 00:16:27,361 There you go. Good luck, Mork. 289 00:16:27,527 --> 00:16:30,280 Oh, thank you. Oh, no, Mind. Pardon me. 290 00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:36,787 - I'll try even though it does clash. - Okay. 291 00:16:37,621 --> 00:16:40,082 - Give him hell. - All right, Mind. 292 00:17:00,936 --> 00:17:04,272 The choice of weapons goes to the challenger. 293 00:17:04,439 --> 00:17:07,609 And I choose the Swords of Cletus. 294 00:17:08,610 --> 00:17:10,862 I was hoping he'd opt for spatulas, Mind. 295 00:17:14,199 --> 00:17:16,243 Take your pick. 296 00:17:16,535 --> 00:17:17,702 Eenie, meenie, minie, Cletus, 297 00:17:17,869 --> 00:17:19,788 hope he doesn't try to cheat us. This one. 298 00:17:19,955 --> 00:17:21,540 But I don't see anything. 299 00:17:21,706 --> 00:17:24,501 Of course not. The Swords of Cletus are invisible. 300 00:17:25,293 --> 00:17:27,045 Observe. 301 00:17:29,131 --> 00:17:30,757 Oh, I get the point. 302 00:17:30,924 --> 00:17:32,008 Oh, that's nothing. 303 00:17:32,175 --> 00:17:33,510 You see that fly up there? 304 00:17:38,223 --> 00:17:39,558 Yeah, but it's still alive. 305 00:17:39,724 --> 00:17:43,019 Yes, but wait till he tries to land. 306 00:17:53,071 --> 00:17:54,156 Okay. 307 00:17:54,322 --> 00:17:57,367 All right, we all know the rules here, don't we? 308 00:17:57,534 --> 00:18:01,496 First man to push his opponent back through the goals wins the Hollitacker. 309 00:18:01,663 --> 00:18:03,915 Now, I want a clean fight here. 310 00:18:04,082 --> 00:18:08,545 And cross blades and may the second-best Orkan win. 311 00:18:08,712 --> 00:18:10,589 Good luck, Mork. You can do it. 312 00:18:11,089 --> 00:18:12,424 Okay. 313 00:18:12,591 --> 00:18:14,634 Not now, not now. 314 00:18:17,929 --> 00:18:19,264 Begin. 315 00:18:21,099 --> 00:18:23,226 Don't fall in. 316 00:18:23,476 --> 00:18:26,146 It always looked easier from the stands, Mind. 317 00:18:28,648 --> 00:18:30,233 All right. 318 00:18:39,993 --> 00:18:41,745 Time out. 319 00:18:42,829 --> 00:18:44,956 - Time in. - Oh, time in? 320 00:18:57,761 --> 00:18:59,429 A little closer. 321 00:19:00,388 --> 00:19:01,640 Mind, your help, please. 322 00:19:01,806 --> 00:19:03,558 If you find the sword, you'll recognize it. 323 00:19:03,725 --> 00:19:05,352 It's the only one you can't see. 324 00:19:11,483 --> 00:19:13,276 My furniture. 325 00:19:13,443 --> 00:19:16,488 It's all right, my dear. When I move in, I'll redecorate. 326 00:19:21,326 --> 00:19:22,577 Hello. 327 00:19:22,744 --> 00:19:23,912 It's for you, Mind. 328 00:19:25,538 --> 00:19:27,332 We've been cut off. 329 00:19:29,584 --> 00:19:32,337 - Mind. - Oh, I think I've found it. 330 00:19:32,504 --> 00:19:34,255 Can you try to hurry up, Mind? No pressure. 331 00:19:34,422 --> 00:19:37,592 One, two, three. 332 00:19:39,052 --> 00:19:41,346 - Here, catch. - Mind. 333 00:19:42,597 --> 00:19:44,432 Pick on me when I'm down, huh? 334 00:19:44,599 --> 00:19:46,309 Well, I'm not anymore. 335 00:19:51,690 --> 00:19:53,066 I'm coming. 336 00:19:53,233 --> 00:19:55,110 Make way, Mind. 337 00:19:56,027 --> 00:19:58,154 Don't make them like they used to. 338 00:20:02,867 --> 00:20:06,329 - Quick, Mork. - Not now, my sweet, have patience. 339 00:20:06,496 --> 00:20:09,124 What's going on in there? 340 00:20:09,666 --> 00:20:11,543 Ixnay on the ollitackerhay. 341 00:20:15,463 --> 00:20:19,092 What have you got against love? 342 00:20:19,634 --> 00:20:21,719 Lorraine Sue's heart was beating faster 343 00:20:21,886 --> 00:20:24,055 than the little drummer boy's stick 344 00:20:24,222 --> 00:20:27,267 and you have to start playing hide and go kinky. 345 00:20:28,685 --> 00:20:30,353 And what's the situation now? 346 00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:33,314 Lorraine Sue is thumbing her way back to Phoenix 347 00:20:33,481 --> 00:20:37,152 and I'm left with my motor racing and no place to park. 348 00:20:39,446 --> 00:20:43,950 Oh, and by the way, don't bother trying to explain this. 349 00:20:44,117 --> 00:20:48,037 I'm sure I'll be filled in by the vice squad later. 350 00:20:49,956 --> 00:20:52,917 All right, Mork, it's been fun, but all good things must come to an end. 351 00:20:53,084 --> 00:20:54,794 Earth and Mindy are now mine. 352 00:20:54,961 --> 00:20:56,337 Eat garlic. 353 00:20:57,547 --> 00:21:00,633 - Please, Mork. - You've got it in for you. 354 00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:05,013 That's it. You've gone too far now. 355 00:21:05,180 --> 00:21:06,890 You've cut Mindy's ribbon. 356 00:21:09,475 --> 00:21:10,685 And that, this is for Mindy. 357 00:21:10,852 --> 00:21:12,520 That's for the couch, that's for the fly, 358 00:21:12,687 --> 00:21:15,231 that's for the candle and this is for... 359 00:21:17,525 --> 00:21:19,611 I hope you didn't take anything I said seriously. 360 00:21:19,777 --> 00:21:21,279 Heat of the battle and all that rot. 361 00:21:21,446 --> 00:21:23,698 All right, Mork. Enough is enough. 362 00:21:23,865 --> 00:21:26,534 It's time to draw this to a close. 363 00:21:26,701 --> 00:21:28,786 Not a bad little dueler. 364 00:21:28,953 --> 00:21:31,206 Not a bad little dancer. 365 00:21:32,207 --> 00:21:34,000 Goodbye, Mork. 366 00:21:41,049 --> 00:21:43,468 You did it. You won. 367 00:21:43,635 --> 00:21:45,970 I don't believe it. You won. 368 00:21:48,264 --> 00:21:50,808 I didn't win. It was your ribbon that really helped. 369 00:21:50,975 --> 00:21:54,062 Congratulations. You fought valiantly. 370 00:21:54,229 --> 00:21:56,064 I've never lost anything before. 371 00:21:56,814 --> 00:22:00,151 I just can't imagine being beaten by Mork. 372 00:22:00,693 --> 00:22:02,612 Well, I think you've learned a good lesson. 373 00:22:02,779 --> 00:22:04,864 On Earth, it's called humility. 374 00:22:05,031 --> 00:22:06,366 Humility. 375 00:22:06,532 --> 00:22:09,535 Yes, strange new stirrings within me. 376 00:22:09,702 --> 00:22:11,704 I'm beginning to feel it. 377 00:22:11,913 --> 00:22:16,417 Yes, thanks to you, Mork, I have acquired humility. 378 00:22:16,584 --> 00:22:18,962 Now, I have everything. 379 00:22:19,587 --> 00:22:21,422 I'll be the perfect leader for the next planet 380 00:22:21,589 --> 00:22:23,049 I decide to grace with my presence. 381 00:22:23,216 --> 00:22:24,300 Well, goodbye. 382 00:22:24,467 --> 00:22:26,177 Beam me up, Scotty. 383 00:22:26,344 --> 00:22:28,638 Farewell, my flawed leader. 384 00:22:35,561 --> 00:22:38,898 Well, Mork, I sure am proud of you. 385 00:22:39,065 --> 00:22:42,110 Well, you know something, Mind, me too. 386 00:22:45,863 --> 00:22:49,325 - Sorry the house is kind of torn apart. - Yeah. 387 00:22:49,492 --> 00:22:54,205 Well, I guess the most important thing is that you're back together again. 388 00:22:54,372 --> 00:22:57,208 The very most important thing is that we're back together again, Mind. 389 00:23:02,130 --> 00:23:05,633 You know, you never told me that Orkan ears unscrew. 390 00:23:06,134 --> 00:23:08,886 Gee, I'm afraid to ask what else comes off. 391 00:23:11,723 --> 00:23:14,225 You got me, Mind. I've tried everything. 392 00:23:23,359 --> 00:23:25,737 Mork calling Orson. 393 00:23:25,903 --> 00:23:28,448 Come in, Orson. 394 00:23:29,824 --> 00:23:31,075 Mork calling Orson. 395 00:23:31,242 --> 00:23:34,120 Come in, Your Grand-Central-Stationness. 396 00:23:34,287 --> 00:23:36,581 - Are you still there, Mork? - Oh, yes, sir. 397 00:23:36,748 --> 00:23:39,167 I heard Xerko challenged you to a Hollitacker. 398 00:23:39,333 --> 00:23:40,501 He did, sir. 399 00:23:40,668 --> 00:23:43,921 But I came, I saw, I conquered. 400 00:23:46,299 --> 00:23:48,009 What? What? 401 00:23:51,762 --> 00:23:56,851 All right, sir, actually, I quivered, I ran, I squeaked by. 402 00:23:57,018 --> 00:23:59,729 Jizzix the Greek gave odds that you wouldn't even show up. 403 00:23:59,896 --> 00:24:02,273 - I know that, sir. - I'm out big bucks, Mork. 404 00:24:02,440 --> 00:24:04,484 Me too, sir. I lost 20 myself. 405 00:24:04,650 --> 00:24:06,486 But I found something even more valuable, sir. 406 00:24:06,652 --> 00:24:09,113 I learned that if you bet against yourself, you always lose. 407 00:24:09,280 --> 00:24:10,698 A little proverb from Monty Hall. 408 00:24:10,865 --> 00:24:14,076 But you wound up winning, Mork. Doesn't that feel good? 409 00:24:14,243 --> 00:24:17,288 Oh, yes, sir. But what makes me feel better is the fact that I tried. 410 00:24:17,455 --> 00:24:19,957 You see, it's not what's in front of you that blocks your way, 411 00:24:20,124 --> 00:24:21,959 it's what's inside of you that holds you back. 412 00:24:22,126 --> 00:24:25,046 The problem with you is what's inside of you is what's in front of you. 413 00:24:25,213 --> 00:24:26,839 A little shot for betting against me. 414 00:24:27,006 --> 00:24:28,925 Until next week, Your Green-Felt-Jungleness.